answered prayer and the Lord’s perfect peace
My hope in starting a blog was to use it as a release, but also to be a testament of God’s goodness in my life. I have seen joy and I have seen pain. The last year of my life has been nothing short of difficult, as I have experienced loss, confusion, and doubt. But I want to also note the God moments in my life, ones that I call “God winks”. God winks are the moments that I see God in, no matter how small. Sometimes going through a tough period in life can cause moments of “God what is there to be thankful for” and “God I do not see you in my life”. In those times of wondering, it can be difficult to live a life of thankfulness. Where is God in those moments?
Over the years I have learned that there really is a lot to be thankful for. The lowest of lows do not compare to the sweetness of living a life beside Jesus and experiencing his good and perfect peace. My life verse that I chose as a measly 8th grader was John 14:27 which states, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” It has taken me a while to truly understand what this verse means. How can I truly experience peace when my life feels like it is constantly falling apart? Trial after trial, and I am exhausted to the point of burning out.
But God has been so good and has made a way for me to truly experience his perfect peace. In the midst of feeling like God wasn’t there, I was continually praying for peace to wash over me and for anxiety to subside. But in that time of prayer, I wasn’t exactly sure what I meant by that. I knew I wanted to be free from what was taking over my mind, but I did not necessarily know what that looked like. But just like the worship songs say, his peace makes no sense. His peace is so perfect and so unlike what we can wrap our minds around. How can I be so anxiety free and be seeing so many blessings when I have so much hurt in my heart? It’s the Lord’s peace. It’s an answered prayer. There is something so sweet about seeing the Lord work even in the darkest of times. It is proof that he is always working for our good, and when you call upon his name, he will answer.